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Sunday, 12 July 2015

Sordid Secret - Part 2

Hi everyone,

For the first part of my four part story, please check out Sordid Secret Part 1.

Apologies for the late post.  I've been working on this post until just now and I'm still not completely happy with it.  I still feel it's working process but it is a continuation.  

I hope you enjoy, as I am more nervous than last week as I feel I needed to spend more time on this.  As I was unwell through the week, and have MA assignments to do, I haven't had a lot of time.  

I think, that once I have completed all four parts, I will put them together into one document - one story, and post an edited/refined version on my website.  I think this will be well worth it as it will give insight on how to improve and edit your work too - and you can see how my story develops.  

Please comment below with any suggestions you have, and if you think posting a final edited/refined copy once all instalments are completed is a great idea, let me know!   

Sordid secret – Part 2, by Janet Cooper

‘Ma’am’ Moore boomed, barging into my office.
‘We have it confirmed.  The victim is Sacha Mason, 22 years old, and she’s originally from Sunderland.  We’ve managed to find a relative, her Grandmother.’ 
‘Good work, let’s go!’
I grabbed my keys and started pushing Moore out of my office and towards the exit of the station. 
‘We’re off to see the victim’s family, Molly, if you find anything, get in touch.’
Molly nodded in agreement as she continued to strike the keys on her keyboard whilst maintaining eye contact and nodding. 
‘She’s a good worker, that Molly.’  I told Moore.
We headed off in Moore’s car to visit Mrs Mcdonald.  It was an hour drive away, but time flew and I continued to mull over my thoughts of the crime scene. 
A frail, small, lady answered the door.  Her white, straggly, hair fell forward over her cheek.  It took her while to get there, we almost left as we thought nobody was home.  She leaned forward onto her zimmer frame and breathed heavily.  Her eyes widened, and she smiled, bearing mainly gum and around three yellow and brown stained teeth.  After some introductions and a flash of our identification, she allowed us in.  We were slowly led into the lounge and her zimmer frame clicked with each thrust forward and it started to bug me.  She refused any assistance from us, even when her breathing increased – she slowed further. 
A layer of thick dust coated the television, the mantel piece and the coffee table, like a dusting of snow.  The air in the property was thick and musty, and a poignant animal smell lingered. A puff of dust sprung up as I sat down abruptly on the couch and I coughed, and I couldn’t help but cringe at the white dog hair that coated the crocheted throw that covered it. 
‘I’m afraid to tell you, Mrs Mcdonald, but we believe your granddaughter, Sacha, has died.’
Mrs Mcdonald didn’t look surprised, but tears did trickle down her cheek.
‘How did it happen?’ she sniffed.
‘We are not entirely sure, there’s an investigation, Mrs Mcdonald.  Could you tell us if Sacha had any enemies?’  I asked.
A laugh escaped from Mrs Mcdonald’s mouth, and then she dabbed her eyes with her handkerchief. 
‘A long list of them!  I’m afraid that girl made a lot of enemies, a bit of a trouble causer you see.  Nicky said he would keep an eye on her but I knew even he wouldn’t be able to keep her out of trouble.’
‘And who’s Nicky, Mrs Mcdonald?’  I asked. 
‘Well, that’s her brother.  Their mother [my daughter] died ten years gone, it was the booze, and their father hadn’t been on the scene for a long time.  The pair of them came to live with me as teens.  They were always close, he’ll be gutted.’
‘And where is Nicky?’
‘Well he moved to shields to be closer to work about two years ago.  That’s why she moved up there, I think he helped her out with paying her bills.  She’s never been the same since the baby, you know.’
‘What baby?’
‘Well six years ago, she had a little girl, called Jersey.  She had a heart defect, unknown like, and she died.  She got a lot of hassle for having a baby so young.  People would say she slept around and that she had been a bad mother, and that’s why Jersey died.  It really got to her.  After that she started talking drugs, and ended up injecting heroine.  She started owing money out and we had loads of people to the door demanding it.  When Nicky moved, he found a place for her too, and helped her get clean.  As far as knew she was doing OK.  She called me week and came for dinner once a month.’
‘When did you last hear from her?’
‘I’m not sure. She usually calls on a Sunday, but she didn’t call yesterday, so about 8 days ago I think.’
‘Can you think of anyone who would want to kill your granddaughter, Mrs Mcdonald?’  I asked. 
‘I can’t think of anyone in her life now.  She used to go out with Max Riches who still lives over the road with his mother, and I assume he was the baby’s dad, but other than that, I think you’ll have to ask Nicky.  I’m surprised you haven’t told him already, he would probably be down as her next of kin.’
‘Why’s did you think he would know, does he live near her?’
‘Well, closer than me, but I thought because he’s one of you lot isn’t he so I thought he would have heard?  He’s in the force.’
‘He’s a Policeman?’
‘Sure.  I thought you must’ve known.’
‘What’s his full name Mrs Mcdonald, Nicky Mason?’
‘Oh, no.  My grandson uses his mother’s name, he refused the name of a stranger.  He is Nicholas Mcdonald.’
The name winded me.  I felt sick.
‘Do you know our Nicky?’ she asked.
I could feel a burning sensation in my chest, were the vomit rose, and then fell again.
‘Yes.  He works in our station, only we had no idea you meant Nick, I mean erm PC Mcdonald.’  Moore said, stepping in.
The rest of the interview seemed to blur into one.  I couldn’t believe that now, I had to go and tell Nick, the uniformed officer that I was trying to avoid, that his sister had been murdered. 
The journey home was quiet and long.  Moore didn’t speak, and neither did I.  Molly tried to call when we were ten minutes from the station so I diverted her call, it could wait until we were back.  Even if I wanted to, I didn’t think I would be able to speak. 
‘I’ve been trying to call you Ma’am.  We have a development.  Sacha Mason had heroine in her system and she was also in the very early stages of pregnancy.  We’re waiting for confirmation.’
‘Right, well let’s keep this in the team for now please.’  I announced loudly.
‘Turns out Sacha’s brother is one of ours so let’s not disclose anything until we absolutely have all the facts, no speculating guys.’ 
‘Right, I want to know who her friends were, who her dealer was, who her neighbours are, who her landlord is.  Go, go, go, team. Oh, and Molly, get a uniformed team to locate Nick Mcdonald.  We need to speak to him asap!’ 
Moore followed me into my office and closed the door.
‘So what’s next then, Ma’am?’
‘Well, I suppose we interview Nick and find out what we can about her.  Maybe he can shed some light on her acquaintances.’
            There was a knock at the door, and Molly popped her head in.
            ‘Nick Mcdonald isn’t on shift today.  Some of the other lads said there was talk of him going fishing for the day with some friends.  I’ve tried his mobile but he can’t be reached.’
            ‘Thanks, Molly.  Get uniform to keep checking if he’s home every hour and let us know.’ Moore ordered.
            ‘Sure,’ Molly said on her way out.
            ‘Do you want me to break the news?’  Moore asked.
            ‘Would you?  I’m supposed to be at Jenny’s parent’s evening tonight.  Not that I’m looking forward to being in the same room as Peter.  But needs must.’
            ‘Ah, have you seen him much?’
            ‘Not since the separation.  Things are still a bit awkward, you know.  We’re trying to get along for Jenny and James, but… erm, it’s not great!’
            ‘Is he still with Julie?’
            ‘Oh, yes, he’s still in love.’  I said through gritted teeth.  ‘Oh, god, hope he doesn’t bring her along!’
            ‘No, Ma’am, surely he can’t be that insensitive.’
            ‘I hope not!’

I was pleased to leave the office for the day, even if I did have to be civil with Peter.  A good soak and a good night sleep meant I could start investigating, refreshed, tomorrow.

I hope you've enjoyed reading, but I really feel this part feels a bit rushed.  Do let me know what you think!  I hate too much repititon in a story, and feel like I have repeated Mrs Mcdonald's name too much.  

Laters, Janet 


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